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You could be unconsciously sabotaging yourself

The unconscious mind is very powerful. Our thoughts and actions are largely based on our subconscious fears and desires, and we do not even realize it.
Think about this for a minute with an open mind. Think of a time when your dream, desire or deepest longing was right in front of you. Think of that time when your dream job or school, or an entrepreneurial opportunity, or even a great romantic love was right there for you—and just when it could have been yours, something happens, and poof!

You start feeling so bad about yourself and the world around you that you can’t even explain why it happened. You begin to question everything and blame God, wishing the circumstances were different, or you simply consider yourself unlucky.

What most of us do not realize is that this is self-sabotage, and we do this all the time. What makes it so difficult to change is that most of the time we are unaware that this is happening. Part of mindful living and conscious awareness is to recognize the patterns.

Look back and see how difficult it has been to get to your fullest potential, or how it always seems to feel like you slide back just as you are about to reach your goals and dreams. Just when you are about to close that deal, finish a project, or get that job you have always wanted, something happens. It can be so simple or so dramatic, but something happens, and what you so desired is no longer within reach.

If you find this happening on a regular basis, luck has nothing to do with it. It is, again, all about limiting subconscious beliefs, and the fear that is stored within your subconscious. What we refer to as luck, karma, opportunities, being in the right place at the right time, serendipity—all that is frequency.

This frequency or energy that you are is housed in your subconscious mind. Which is why, half the time, we are so completely unaware of what is happening inside us. We play the blame game and become reactive toward our own lives. But there is a way to recognize, change and reconfigure your frequency so that you attract your dreams, desires and fullest potential.

Muscle testing

This muscle testing method is based on the science of kinesiology. It is really quite easy and amazingly accurate. Here are the simplified steps for you to try.

1) Download a compass app on your cell phone and face north.
2) Make sure you are hydrated; drink at least a glass of water before doing this exercise.
3) Place your hands on the side and keep your spine straight and close your eyes.
4) Out loud, say, “My name is (state your name).” Your body will naturally tilt forward. Say, “My name is (make up a name).” Your body will naturally tilt backwards. Test this further by saying “Yes, yes, yes” and “No, no, no.” Your body will move forward for “Yes” and backwards for “No.”
5) If your body does not move, you are dehydrated; take another glass of water and then do the test questions again.
6) Then make the following statements to yourself to test your subconscious belief systems. “I am worthy of achieving my dreams.” (Most people self-sabotage because they feel they are unworthy.) “Dreams can be reality.” (Some people feel that dreams can never become reality because this is what they have been programmed to believe, for whatever reason.)
7) Remember that the beliefs do not have to make sense to your conscious mind. You will find that the beliefs your conscious mind may find incredible are actually the ones that hold you back. These include: “Money is the root of all evil”; “There is lack in this world”; “If I reach my full potential, I will die”; or “I have a vow of poverty.” Most of us who have been self-sabotaging will have these beliefs. And yes, we can change it.
8) Fear is the great paralyzer. Fear can totally disable you emotionally and spiritually in all aspects of your life. Fear is the direct opposite of love. Check for limiting beliefs on the following, over and above what I have just suggested: I fear success. I self-sabotage. I fear becoming a different person if I reach my full potential. I fear moving forward. I fear (add your own fears here).

Changing beliefs

Please note that the muscle test does not function as a lie detector. It does not determine the truth; for this particular purpose, it is used to determine beliefs. Asking help from a professional will make the process go faster, but you can definitely do it yourself.
There are many ways to change beliefs; some are faster and more effective than others.

Beliefs that are not fully ingrained in your subconscious are, of course, faster to remove.
The more attached you are to your beliefs, the more difficult it will be to change. Remember that all beliefs serve you in one way or another; otherwise, you would not have accepted the programing to begin with.

1) Determine what your limiting beliefs are without judging yourself. Do this through the muscle testing.
2) Trace the source of your belief. Did it come from school, family, society, religion, etc.? Acknowledge and validate that the limiting belief is not the truth. You decide what you want to keep and what you want to remove. All decisions are made by you and you alone.
3) Reprogram your thoughts through repeated action and affirmations. Affirmations will work only if you have determined your limiting beliefs, and make a decision to release them with the intent of changing them.
4) Take action. Step out of your comfort zone. This is the only way to release the limiting belief.
5) Like, love and celebrate your achievements to validate yourself and experience the new joy these new thoughts are bringing you.

I know it sounds a bit abstract, but remember that we are working with frequency and energy here. Both are propelled by thought, action, intent and determination. Start slowly, and begin to feel the difference immediately.


You will know when the limiting belief has been changed successfully because when you do the muscle test again, you will now test “No” where you tested “Yes” before. When you see the results made manifest in your day-to-day life, you can repeat the process as often as you like.
You will begin to reach your goals with ease and grace. And if you don’t, stop judging yourself and stop labeling yourself as unlucky. Simply find the limiting belief and change it.
You are in charge of your own life. Empower yourself, determine and change your limiting beliefs, and start living the life you have always desired. Dreams do become reality. Your birthright is to be happy.

Visit www.liabernardo.com; e-mail: namaste@liabernardo.com

Read more on the The Philippine Daily Inquirer Thriving in SouLove column.

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